This week I have spent more time responding to my neighbors on Nextdoor.com than I have since I moved to Gaithersburg ten years ago. A very active and poopular 😏 thread was entitled, "Toilet paper strategies?" As of this moment, there are 55+ responses offering advice to a man who is struggling to find toilet paper for his family. I offered to sell him a bag (at cost) if he can't find one anywhere.
Asking for help is a great coping strategy when one is struggling to come up with a strategy, even for finding toilet paper. What other kinds of coping strategies can help us through this historic and unprecedented time?
I'll share a strategy that helped me stay strong during the peer review process back in 2007. It is one of the seven habits that Stephen R. Covey wrote about in his book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
Let's see if we can use some of the advice in that book as we face the pandemic. Read on for some helpful coping strategies and other insights.
The 7 Strategies for Highly Effective People Facing a Pandemic
And other useful tips and insights!
No matter how perfect or careful you may be, life will never be trouble-free. When trouble comes, it's important to have coping strategies that help you navigate through choppy waters. Without further ado, here are the seven top strategies for highly effective people.
Strategy #1: Begin with the end in mind
This strategy helped me not just survive but thrive during my peer-review process. As Stephen R. Covey wrote, " 'Begin with the end in mind' is based on the principle that all things are created twice.There's a mental or first creation, and a physical or second creation to all things.' " (p99) Imagine who you would like to remember yourself being a year or two down the road. Do you want to remember yourself showing good judgment and being strong, positive, and compassionate during this pandemic? Then, follow the script you've created in your mind and be that person now, knowing that you are forming memories for your future self. Your future self will one day look back at who you are right now with appreciation and satisfaction. Of course, this is a habit that you can apply to your entire life.
Strategy #2: Be proactive
Between the event and the outcome is you. You are the interpreter and transformer of the event, with the freedom to apply your will and intention on the event. Whether it is living through a pandemic or dealing with misplaced keys, every day you are revealing your nature through how you deal with life. To be proactive is different from being reactive. "The ability to subordinate an impulse to a value is the essence of the proactive person." (p72) My daughter shared some of the things she plans to do with her free time as she stays put in her apartment in NYC so that she doesn't slip into a passive state and waste her time. That's being proactive.
Strategy # 3: Proper Priorities
Or, as Covey would say, "put first things first." During a pandemic, when the world seems to be precariously tilting at an angle, it's easy to cling to outdated standards, expectations, and behavioral patterns. Doing so heightens a sense of regret, fear, and scarcity. You can adapt to rapid changes and shift your expectations to reflect the current reality more easily if you are value-centered. For example, valuing gratitude will empower you to deal with financial loss differently because you can still choose gratitude in the face of uncontrollable losses. If your happiness is measured by how much money you have, then it would make sense that when the amount shrinks, so does your happiness.
Strategy # 4: A Win/win Mentality
This state of mind is built on character. Covey separates character into three categories: integrity, maturity, and abundance mentality. A lack of character resulted in the hoarding of toilet paper in our community and the cry for help from Nextdoor.com. I noticed that in the 55+ responses that included advice about using bidets, old towels, and even leaves, no one offered to share a bag of toilet paper. Because I believe abundance comes from Life Source and have experienced abundance flowing back to me when I shared unselfishly, I trusted that sharing my modest supply of toilet paper would lead to other sources when I need them. So, I offered a bag.
Strategy # 5: Develop Empathy and Understanding
To seek first to understand and then be understood is one of the most powerful tools of effective people. In my holistic practice, every patient comes in with their own unique needs that evolve into other needs. I must remain open to people's needs, or I fail to deliver appropriately. I continually try to improve myself so that I can be all that my patients need me to be. Learning to listen and then to clearly communicate ideas is essential to effective healthcare. For example, during this time, it is critical that political leaders listen and understand and then clearly communicate to help everyone in the best way possible.
Strategy # 6: Synergize and Integrate
In other words, the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. All of life is interdependent, each part no more or less important than any other. Is oxygen more important than hydrogen? Is H2O different from the oxygen and hydrogen atoms that make it? During a pandemic, it's important for us to appreciate each other's contributions to the whole and to work together synergistically for the good of the whole. Our survival depends on valuing each other and our planet. For example, it's important to practice social distancing and staying home to minimize the spread of the virus and its impact on the healthcare system, regardless of whether one belongs in the high-risk population or not.
Strategy # 7: Self-care
There are five aspects of your life that depend on your self-care: spiritual, mental, emotional, physical, and social. Unfortunately, many kind-hearted people are kinder to others than to themselves. There is really only one person who can truly take care of you properly, and that is yourself. In Seattle, Washington, where many suffer from the pandemic, holistic psychiatrist David Kopacz, MD, is reminding people to nurture themselves in his post, Nurture Yourself During the Pandemic: Try New Recipes! Indeed, that is what many must do since eating out increases exposure to COVID-19. I'm actually thankful for being forced to cook more. I disliked salt on my salads, MSG in food, and refined sugars in desserts, but I had gotten lazy. If you find yourself stuck at home with more time on your hands, take the opportunity to do what you've always wanted to do, even if it's to stare at the ceiling and wiggle your toes.
This too shall pass. After this pandemic is over, will you remember yourself with appreciation and gratitude? Let's try to grow from this experience with all the power we have as individuals and as a community. Take care and may you remain strong and healthy!
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey
Illustration by Sara Bloem